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Clay Aiken’s Gay

by Michael Nolan

aiken So now that he’s a daddy himself, now that five years of speculation have been swept under the rug, now that he’s had a successful reprisal of his role as Sir Robin in Monty Python’s Spamalot, now that his musical career has accomplished nothing…

Clay Aiken is coming out.

When the article comes out in People Magazine later this week I am pretty sure that there will be someone somewhere who is actually surprised by this revelation, but anyone who has actually heard the guy talk, walk or sing always knew.

Even before the photos of him trolling around on gay sex web sites surfaced, we knew and yet Aiken denied it all.

He denied it as he professed his devout Christianity, he denied it as he released an album called "Measure of a Man" (which some of us knew had more to do with a ruler than the content of anyone’s character), and now that he has fathered a child out of wedlock with a woman named Jaymes (I can’t make this stuff up, folks) he is ready to come out and say "I’m here, I’m queer."

Guess what, Gaykin?  We know.  And at least a few of us wish you would go back into the closet and weld the damned door shut.

I know this sounds unusually harsh.  I know I should be supportive of anyone who wants to admit to their sexual identity.  The fact is that I am sick and tired of people riding their popularity for every cent they can get until it is financially advantageous for them to tell everyone they’re a flamer.

So Clay Aiken is gay.  I think I might sleep better tonight, but I’ll probably just take an Ambien just to be sure.


One Response to “Clay Aiken’s Gay”

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