Pride & Opinions

Since when is this news?

Ah…right. Since homosexuality is not only a choice, but a sin and an abomination.

I’m grateful to the scientific community for working so diligently to validate homosexuality as a natural and acceptable thing, but I have about as much hope that that information will be accepted by the mainstream public as I have that a die-hard creationist will accept the theories of evolution.

Moving on: I’m in the mood to be ten different kinds of catty today, and thankfully I’ve got Roseanne Barr’s big fat mouth to take it out on. Who’s up for a little celebrity snarking?

I’m sure we’ve all heard about her little debacle on that California radio station.

Oh? We haven’t? Well, let me give you a little taste of what she said. In a rant worthy of Trashy Celebs, Roseanne spewed,

“Never once in my 54 years have I ever once heard a gay or lesbian person who’s politically active say one thing about anything that was not about them. They don’t care about minimum wage, they don’t care about any other group other than their own self because you know, some people say being gay and lesbian is a totally narcissistic thing and sometimes I wonder.”

Well isn’t that the pot calling the kettle fat - oops, I mean black. I don’t know who poured sand in her va-hoo-hoo, but maybe someone with a gay pride bumper sticker cut her off in traffic on her way to the radio station.

While I’m not surprised that Roseanne’s been mouthing off - she made a career out of it, after all - I am a little disgusted to hear that coming from her mouth after she received the Trevor Project’s Annual Life Award. I hope she’s never manning those suicide hotlines. She might just tell them, “Oh, just shut up about yourself and go on and do it, kid. Remember it’s down the road, not across the street.”

Roseanne made the domestic goddess famous - a figure that was once expected to stay behind closed doors, do the laundry, mop the floor, and not expect to be noticed for her hard work. Roseanne didn’t quite demand acknowledgment, but she gained it anyway through her hard-edged, bluntly honest and humorous portrayal of the life of the modern American housewife. Roseanne made a career out of talking about herself, basically. She brought the domestic goddess out of the closet and the laundry room.

So explain to me how the efforts of gay activists to be recognized in the same way are narcissistic, and yet her shtick isn’t?

Oh? It’s comedy? Sure, it’s comedy, but it made her famous. It put her in the limelight where everything could be about her (hello, self-titled sitcom). She has no right to talk about someone else’s narcissism. Nor is she particularly well-informed enough to do so; she may want to spend a bit of time perusing this list of gay politicians, followed by this list of lesbian politicians. Look at those rosters of both elected and appointed officials, look at their accomplishments and agendas, and tell me that they focus only on themselves and their sexuality. Tell me that they don’t have other issues on their political platforms. Women’s rights. Abortion. Public schools. Minimum wage. Taxes. Welfare. All the major issues that matter to voters, no matter the state or country. Look at those people, see them as people and not as generalities falling under the gay and lesbian label, and tell me that they don’t care about anything but themselves. I dare you.

You can’t, can you.

It’s nice that sometimes you wonder, Roseanne. Sometimes I wonder, too.

I wonder how the world looks through the eyes of someone suffering from such a severe case of rectal-cranial inversion.

Well! I feel better now. Who’s up for coffee? Anyone? Promise, I only used three cups of grounds for the pot today instead of the typical ten. The lining of your stomach is safe. Stop by, sit down, have a cup. I’d like to have a chat anyway. In fact, I’ve been thinking about instituting an “Ask Adri” feature - maybe once a week, maybe more, depending on if anyone…well…asks Adri anything. Think of it as a gay Ann Landers, only with a little more spice.

Need advice? Curious about something? Just feel like setting yourself up as a target for a little good-natured snarking? E-mail me at adrien-luc.sanders@451press.net with the subject line “Ask Adri Question” or use the contact form on this website to send me a message.

Well, that’s it from me for today. ’scuse me if I vented my spleen a little.

roseanne, roseanne barr, roseanne arnold, celebrity gossip, celebrity trash, gay-bashing, gay science, gay genetics