Pride & Opinions

If you are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender it is up to you to learn your own history.  That is the purpose of Historic Thursdays here at Pride and Opinions, because we as the GLBT community need to know our roots.  I promise you won’t learn this stuff in school.

Throughout school we are taught about the horrific acts associated with the Holocaust, but the focus was always (at least in my education) on the atrocities inflicted upon the Jewish people.  While I am in no way attempting to imply that the impact on the Jewish community was unfathomable I feel that it is important for me to mention an aspect of the Holocaust of which you may or may not be aware.

It is a little known thing called Paragraph 175.

Read the rest of this entry »

Welcome to the first weekly edition of Wildcard Wednesdays here at Pride and Opinions.  Each week on hump day I am likely to talk about almost anything under the sun.  Anything goes on Wildcard Wednesdays!

Since I am a new name on this site, I thought I’d jump at the chance to talk about my favorite topic – myself!

I am an almost 36 year old gay guy living with my partner and our roommate in Birmingham, Alabama.  I used to be a bartender at a gay bar here in the city and now work as a full-time freelance writer and part-time photographer when my schedule permits (which is rare these days).

I have been a vocal advocate for the GLBT community for years, with several years invested as an out gay radio show host and working occasionally with the now defunct GAYBC radio station.  Prior to that I spent some time in the U.S. Air Force where I learned how to tear an airplane apart and rebuild it from scratch, and yet I can’t even change the oil in my own car.

In closing, let me give you a preview of what you can expect on a daily basis here at Pride and Opinions:

Musical Mondays
Every Monday we will take a look at music by and for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender artists from around the world.

Topical Tuesdays
Tuesdays are a day to watch out for.  That’s when I will be giving my weekly opinions, most often by way of video post.  Put on your seatbelts!

Wildcard Wednesdays
As stated before, anything goes on Wednesdays!

Historic Thursdays
Posts on issues relating to GLBT historical events past, present and future.

Fabulous Fridays
No better way to end the week than with some light hearted gossip and fun!

Saturday Dance Party
Its the weekend and it is all about dance music.  I will be joined periodically by my roommate BBGQ – one of the biggest dance music fags on the face of the earth.

The Sunday Times
On Sundays it is time to take a look at GLBT news from all over the world.

My name is Michael Nolan and I am a big flaming fag. Okay, so while that isn’t quite the truth, what is true is that I am a homosexual. Yeah, I’m gay.

I’m also quite opinionated as you will no doubt find out soon since I am the new host of Pride and Opinions.

My intent here is to share information about the GLBT community and to present my opinions about a variety of topics. You are likely to find just about anything here, so consider this your only warning that the views expressed here at Pride and Opinions are exclusively mine unless I specifically tell you otherwise.

In other words, don’t go blaming anyone else for what I say here. I will assume that if you have a view to express that is worth reading you will understand how to leave a comment and say it to me.

Did I mention that I can be quite opinionated? ‘cuz yeah, its like that.

At least once a week you will have the opportunity to not only read but to see and hear me giving my opinions about whatever is on my mind through a video blog post like the one above. If you are a member of YouTube, feel free to respond in kind by making a video response of your own.

In other words, I want you to interact. If I say something you like, say so. If I say something you don’t like, tell me why. We are (mostly) mature adults here, at least I think we are…

I really liked this article in Cookie Magazine, which discusses one parent’s reaction to her son wanting to wear a dress to preschool. Obviously, it’s not the be-all end-all of fixing discrimination against differently gendered youth, but it’s a good perspective. I especially liked this part:

Sam’s declaration that he would wear the dress to school saved us, in a way, from having to make a decision. He had already made up his mind. I warned Sam carefully that if he wore it, he would probably get teased. He was undeterred, adamant about wearing the dress; clearly, avoiding teasing was a lower priority for Sam than simply being himself. I could see that standing up for his choices in a relatively safe and supportive environment was a useful life lesson. And it occurred to me that having confidence—being proud of who he is, even if he’s different from other kids—is the best defense against the inevitable ridicule.

So we coached Sam, as best we could, on what to say to the children at preschool who might tease him. We role-played the kinds of things he could say back to them. We talked about how much teasing can hurt, and how teasing is wrong.

At that morning’s drop-off, my confidence in Sam moved up a notch when he announced to his teacher, “Look at my pretty dress! No one is allowed to make fun of me.”

After school, Sam beamed as he reported that his teachers had said they liked his dress, and the other 4-year-olds had said he looked pretty. But the kids in the 5-year-old class had teased him and told him that he was “girly,” that “boys can’t wear dresses,” and that he “must not be a boy.”

“What did you say back?” I asked, hiding my trepidation behind an encouraging smile.

“I said, ‘Don’t make fun of me! I can be a boy and wear a dress, because it is my choice!’”

Read the whole article here.

Link via the Family Equality Council Blog.

GLBT Families, GLBT, Children

GLBT Families, GLBT, Children

It’s been quite the week, and with all the required napping, this third trimester of pregnancy is currently massively decreasing my productivity. But here are some links for you all to sustain a good weekend!

* Family Equality Council: “Ohio Republicans have difference of opinion regarding lesbian and gay parenting.” - “Not all Republicans are convinced it’s a good idea. Ohio House Speaker Jon Husted (R) says, “This is not an issue about gays, this is about childrenâ€?.”
* Mombian: “Nominate a Lesbian for “America’s Favorite Momâ€?” - “Does an LGBT mom really stand a chance? Who knows? Maybe they’d pick one of us just to seem trendy. Even if not, maybe we can open some eyes behind the scenes.”
* Family Equality Council: “No hate here……” - “I am overwhelmed by the majority of youth that I have come into contact with; they predominantly believe that family IS a place made of love and they aren’t imprisoned by the strict and regimented views that many take on the topic of family.”

See you Monday!

I’ve noticed in the past few months that discussions of the rights of GLBT families to adopt children have eclipsed discussion of marriage in political circles. Now, maybe some of this is my selective perception, since I’ve got babies on the brain, and maybe it’s because the beginining of actual civil unions in a lot of states has folks asking what the next step is at the same time that reactionary states are backlashing. I’m not really sure, but either way, it’s interesting. And in this case, the Family Equality Council has my opinion captured in a nutshell, when speaking about the push to ban adoption amongst gay couples in Tennessee:

The Tennessean has posted its position on the subject:

“The bill is flawed in two fundamental ways. First, the suggestion that a gay couple or an unmarried heterosexual couple, by definition, is fundamentally an unstable familial relationship is just plain mistaken. Caring couples, married or unmarried, gay or straight, exist statewide. Those relationships are not automatically unstable. To the contrary, many stable relationships are found in those categories. Some of them want to adopt children.�

The publication goes on to say that the bigger flaw is the implication that a married heterosexual couple is automatically considered a stable family environment for children.

Linda O’Neal is executive director of the Tennessee Commission on Children and Youth. She points out knowledge supported by research:

“Research also does not support restricting adoption options. The American Psychological Association reports not a single study has found children of lesbian or gay parents disadvantaged in any significant respect relative to children of heterosexual parents. Indeed, the evidence to date suggests home environments provided by lesbian and gay parents are as likely as those provided by heterosexual parents to support and enable children’s psychosocial growth. The American Psychiatric Association reports children raised in gay or lesbian households do not show any greater incidence of homosexuality or gender identity issues than other children.�

GLBT, GLBT Families, gay adoption, Tennessee

GLBT, GLBT Families, gay adoption, Tennessee

Mombian has a great summary of a new comprehensive report, the first of its kind, on the experiences of LGBT families in schools. Called “Involved, Invisible, Ignored,” it details the ways that LGBT parents are involved in their children’s educations, and the way that they are harrassed by others in those situations. As Dana points out, “At first glance, the findings seem to jibe with what I would have guessed—which makes it no less important to have this kind of data to support policymaking and drive change. I’m not sure whether to be shocked at how many LGBT families experience harassment or be relieved the numbers aren’t higher.”

According to the press release at GLSEN, who produced the study,

“Students with lesbian, gay, bisexual and/or transgender parents face isolation, invisibility and alienation due to harassment, name-calling and bullying in their schools,” said COLAGE Executive Director Beth Teper, who has a lesbian mother. “On behalf of the millions of people who have one or more LGBT parents, COLAGE urges students, schools and communities to learn about this important issue as the first step in building safe school environments for all. We also applaud youth with LGBT parents who act as educators and leaders every day when they navigate often unwelcoming schools.”

I’m looking forward to reading all 141 pages.

GLBT families, harassment, schools

GLBT families, harassment, schools

I remember when I was an undergrad that during GLBT pride week, or whatever it was called, that culminated in the Queer Union dance, there was always a sidewalk chalking that highlighted prominent GLBT figures throughout history. Though there was some question about individual people’s inclusion and whether those people were “really” gay, it was always provocative to be forced to rethink traditional historical narratives about family and important figures. Ramon’s Gay Life Blog at About.com has a good link to a Short History of Gay Rights, and here’s a good place to start:

Gay history. How far we’ve come given where we started.

“In 1779, Thomas Jefferson proposed a law that would mandate castration for gay men and mutilation of nose cartilage for gay women,” About.com Civil Liberties Guide Tom Head explains. “But that’s not the scary part. Here’s the scary part: Jefferson was considered a liberal. At the time, the most common penalty on the books was death.”

Today, some 224 years later, we must continue to demand gay equality. We must. LGBT teens make up 33% all teen suicides. Gays and lesbians are still targets of hate crimes. If my partner were severally ill, I would have no legal right to make medical decision or transfer my pension in the case of my death. The list of things I consider natural rights seems endless,. Yet I pause to celebrate how far we’ve come. I must, in hope of a brighter future.

A little learning’s never a bad thing.

GLBT, GLBT History

GLBT, GLBT History

I always think of the PTA as the bastion of stay at home moms in all their stereotypes, but the Family Equality Council blog has a different take - they say that LGBT parents should join the PTA not only to create connections with other parents but also to increase diversity and inclusiveness throughout the school:

It’s particularly important that LGBTQ parents get and stay active in groups like the Parent Teacher Assocation (PTA). PTA activities often set the tone for the school culture. Parents build relationships with other parents and teachers through shared work and efforts to improve the schools, and therefore get invested in each other and each others’ families.

Being involved in the PTA should first be about improving the educational experience of a child’s life, but in the case of LGBTQ parents, involvement doubles as a way to make the school safer and more inclusive of diverse family types.

I admit, I hadn’t really thought of this angle, but it’s a good tip, especially since study after study indicates that hatred and discrimination decrease with actual contact to people who are different from oneself. What do you all think - would you join the PTA to increase diversity in your child’s school?

GLBT Families, GLBT, PTA

GLBT Families, GLBT, PTA

This Friday, for my link round-up, I’m actually highlighting one series at The Republic of T., because I think it’s really good, and, although long, really is a must-read for everyone who cares about LGBT rights and the disenfranchised in general. It’s not short, but definitely good.

* The Society of the Owned, Pt. 1: “The ownership society that has always been is just more clearly identified than before, as is the society of the owned now. The trick, and it worked for a while, was to convince the society of the owned that it too was part of the ownership society.”
* The Society of the Owned, Pt. 2: Under the Bus: “Conservatism apparently holds that some people should end up under the bus, or at the very least no one should try to keep them from ending up there.”
* The Society of the Owned, Pt. 3: Deeper in Debt: “What happens when people who thought they were members of the ownership society find out they’re not, and find out which club they really belong to?”
* The Society of the Owned, Pt. 4: Caught in the Middle: “Upward mobility in the American economy has always been something like the popular 1980s computer game, “Frogger,â€? in which players had to maneuver their frogs across a busy street.”
* The Society of the Owned, Pt.5: The Rage of a Middle Class: “The only sector that’s experiencing job growth (besides government, ironically enough, given the current administration) is the service industry — where wages are lower and benefits fewer — and even that growth is outpace by job losses in other sectors, where does that leave the laid-off middle class homeowner whose mortgage payment just went up at the same time that the value of her home plummeted and her bank cut off access to the home equity loan that many like her would might otherwise draw upon?”

Terrance mentions that there will be more posts in this series, and I’ll be sure to highlight them when they come up.